Honoring Commitments

Just two weeks ago, Belli, my avid 12-year-old ballerina hit a major bump in her ballet journey. I need to work through a bit of history to make light of what happened. So, thank you for your patience.

She has been taking classical ballet lessons since she was eight (a little late, in fact) and had fallen very much in love with the dance somewhere along the way. Since she started training for pointes she has had to attend 3-hour lessons, 3 times a week, so her life has been a precarious juggling act. Aside from ballet she takes violin lessons 2 times a week. She also is a member of the student council at school, which meets once a week, and of the school band, which practices once a week. She doesn't have down time and neither does she have a social life.

There are nights she gets home at 10 pm or a little after. After which, she eats dinner (you can't dance on a full stomach) while reviewing for a test or doing homework. We have discussed this matter of too-much-on-one's-plate time and time again but she refuses to let go of any one of those responsibilities. It is her choice and she must not do anything half-baked. This, she is aware of.

She has been doing an outstanding job, I must say. In fact, too heroic for someone as young as she is. But then again, I keep reminding myself, it is her choice, it is, therefore, okay, and that all these build character. So I let it be and I try to support/assist/encourage her in everything she tries to do. That it has not been easy is a gross understatement. So much so that just last week she hit her breaking point.

We were having dinner and, of a sudden, she broke into tears. "I'm quitting ballet. I don't have a life. I miss my friends. I never have time to just do nothing and hang out. I'm so tired." I was stunned/disappointed/relieved/empathetic/saddened all at the same time. I hugged her and let her cry and then, told her that, sure, she could do whatever she wanted, but that she had to think about it for two weeks and then come to a final decision. She agreed.

It hadn't even been a week when she came to me and said, "Mom, I'm not quitting ballet anymore. I love it too much and I've worked too hard. My classmates are my family." And so she continues to dance and she continues to manage a tough life. But don't all athletes, and artists, and everyone else who strive for something bigger than themselves?

She doesn't do it alone. The whole family goes through the journey with her. Vacations, occasions, commitments have had to be sacrificed in order for her not to miss class. But the biggest sacrifice comes from that 12-year-old body and mind that keeps proving just how much strength, and courage, and perseverance, and motivation lies inside it.

Here she is at their recent ballet showcase, doing what she loves best. Brava, Belli!